Oyinkansola Alabi is the Principal Coach of Emotions City, an Emotions Coaching and Consulting Firm. The Cornell University-Trained Human Resource Executive, Certified Life Coach, Cognitive Behavioral Specialist, Licensed Emotional Intelligence Practitioner, only female six seconds network leader in Nigeria, is also the convener of the first ever Emotional Intelligence Week in Nigeria and arguably in Africa. Abiola Alaba Peters had a chat with the convener of the first ever Emotional Intelligence Week in Nigeria and arguably in Africa.
You recently launched the free counseling line and giving 2 free counseling to those who need closure and therapy, what inspired this move?
Since the government is yet to neither take full responsibility for the mental health industry nor create a mental health portfolio, we the mental health practitioners have to keep creating and sustaining mental health projects and platforms. If we don’t, many more people will commit suicide, will be depressed, will be overwhelmed by life, will be helpless and will be clueless.
You run the first emotional intelligence founded by a woman. How does it make you feel being a female pioneer of such?
Quite frankly I didn’t even know I was the first woman to premier an Emotional Intelligence Academy affiliated with the Six Seconds Emotional Intelligence Network USA until I was told. I am consumed by the desire to help individuals and organizations learn how to attain emotional stability, increase their productivity, deepen their peace and increase profitability. So I will keep initiating projects that drives the truth about the fact that emotions drive people, people drive performance.
What makes you different from every other woman?
My authenticity is my differentiating factor. Authenticity means how deep you are true to yourself. My authenticity helps me walk my talk.
How and at what point in your life did you discover your chosen field?
I have always known that I was created to give life where death looms; I however didn’t know the fragrance or flavor of problems I was created to solve. I love where I am now and the role I play as the Emotions Doctor. I am also willing and available to embark on the next chapter of my life.
How is it managing the home front and your career?
I prefer to refer to it as work life integration. I am getting better at synchronizing all the elements that make me happy. I am improving daily and I love the results we are all experiencing already.
How would you describe vulnerable women?
I stand to be corrected but I have observed that Nigeria has a patriarchal culture. A culture that subtly believes that leadership belongs to men. As long as this narrative exists, women will only try but may still not be giving the privilege to lead at some high level engagements.
What are you working on presently?
Our newest project is called The Midnight Listeners a coaching and therapy platform that runs at midnight in Nigeria. So while others close for the day, we run a 24 hours mental and emotional hub. We are also the first round the clock mental hub in Africa.
Are you satisfied with the level of women involvement in politics?
I am thankful that I presently regarded as one of the leading voices of mental health in Nigeria. I am also consumed by the passion to equip more people with tools on how to increase their productivity, happiness and profitability.
What do you consider the strongest point in a woman?
A woman’s strongest point is her soul, her energy, her voice, her authenticity. An attack on her soul is an attack on her essence.
Following your chosen field, do you cover all ages or it’s specifically for certain ages?
We serve the rich, the poor, the vulnerable, outcasts and everyone. As long as you have a soul, Emotions City is willing and available to listen to you and help you solve your emotional instabilities.
What are the challenges you usually encounter in your field?
I am in a field plagued my men. Men who have been programmed to think it’s their birth right to lead. Men who support other men and will choose other men before they remember women exist. They do this not because they hate women but because they have been scripted to reach out to other men before women. The second interesting challenger is fact that some clients feel entitled to your time and expertise. They feel it is your responsibility to serve them for free once they reach out to you. Most of them haven’t been trained to take responsibility for their mental health. They have been trained to request for freebies so once your invoice welcomes them to reality, they freeze and some resort to emotional blackmail. This really doesn’t bother me because I am aware I can’t help everyone. I will only help those I desire to.
Your Favorite Sport?
I doubt I have a favorite sport but I love swimming, cycling, dancing and walking.
Your favorite food?
My favorite meal is plantain and snail.
Your beauty routine?
Quite frankly, I have none. But I try visiting my masseuse once a month, watching my calorie, exercising and hanging out with my close friends on Friday evenings.
If you have your way, what would want to change about yourself and women in general?
Maybe I would to be a little more outgoing. I really don’t enjoy networking or attending large events. I prefer intimate gatherings. I am an introvert who plays extroverted roles.
What do you want to be remembering for?
Here is what I want written on my epitaph in about six decades. A woman, who lived, loved, listened and served, emotionally capricious souls’.
Any plans towards retiring to new plans when you get old?
Purpose is progressive so I am sure I will be more informed than I am now when I am at that stage.